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Friday, March 19, 2004
Went with Khin to see the Body Worlds exhibit at Singapore Expo today. It was pretty gross at first, seeing all the human body parts that my skin shields from prying eyes. That's precisely why I'm not in the Science stream this year - I can't bring myself to do my bio practicals which will involve dissections of animals, and because I won't do bio, I won't have enough subjects. It was interesting enough, but I realised that the exhibits started to look the same after about half an hour of walking. Left the place and headed for Orchard. I was so damn hungry, for some odd reason! Ate non-stop once we got to Orchard, and left later feeling awful. Sighs. Another day, gone like that. It was well-spent, though! Haven't seen Khin in ages... It was great just being able to talk to her in person again. Will have to resolve to do more of that since she's gonna be leaving for New Mexico soon - and most definitely by the end of this year.
Have been doing my scholarship research ever since I got home. My resolve to win one deservedly has increased ever since talking to her today. It always increases markedly after conversations with Khin or Trina. I'm gonna have to get over my intense fear of being interviewed by a panel of people all waiting to judge me based on my answers. If I wanna get anything, go anywhere, I'm gonna have to present myself as someone who has brains in interviews. Right now, I spontaneously combust every interview. All the interviewer(s) has to do is to ask me one question. Then it's snap - goodbye to any bit of sense and intelligence that Kelly ever possessed. I can't go anywhere if I continue like that. What's wrong with me, anyways? I believe I sound decently intelligent in normal conversations with people (or I may be wrong, but I do know that I sound a thousand times better than in an interview, anyways). Why can't I be myself in an interview? It doesn't make sense.
I don't make sense to myself. Nevertheless, my endless search goes on. My never-ending barrage of self-berating goes on, and everything repeats itself. Still, it's gotta stop somewhere. Where?
heard
those magic reindeer click @
8:05 PM
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