|
Saturday, July 31, 2004
What do you do when one of your closest friends in the whole world is gonna leave you after all the years of standing by your side?
What do you do when you try to feel glad - and you truly are, deep down inside - but sometimes the fact that she's going makes you so overwhelmingly sad?
What do you do when a friend who's always been there for you - in the form of messages, house-visits or outings is going to leave and may never return?
What do you do when you feel that you still have a lot to say to your friend, but she's already leaving and you have a sad sad feeling that you'll never see her for a long time?
What do you do when your friend who's always given you good advice about anything under the sun isn't around to do just that anymore?
What do you do when a person you have a lot of fun with laughing about the silliest things isn't around to do that with you anymore?
What do you do when you feel like you're getting left behind?
What on earth do you do when you feel like crying for more than one thing - but the one thing that weighs most heavily on your mind is the fact that one damn good friend isn't gonna be around anymore?
Don't go, Khin. :( I know you have to go, so yeahhh, what I just said 40 characters ago isn't gonna happen anytime soon. Sighs. But letting go is just so hard, and don't laugh, but my eyes are actually starting to fill with tears as I type all this in. Life's gonna be so different without you around. Different in a bad way, though I often tell you otherwise. Heh. There still seems so much left unsaid between the two of us, but I want you to know that you've been such a great GREAT friend, and thankyou for every single thing - yeah, even your bullying.
Though you keep telling me that you wanna see me in the US next year too - and believe me, I DO wanna be seeing you there then - chances are high that I'll be stuck where I am for another one year or so. Still. Wait for me, yeah? I'm trying so hard to keep up with you and everyone else, but it seems like everyone around me has moved on and I'm still stuck in the past - in reverse mode, in fact. I just wanna tell them to wait for me, that I'll catch up if only they'd wait, but often enough, I find myself coughing in everyone's dust as they propel on ahead. Oh-well. Actually, what's the point of blogging about all this? Seriously. Sigh. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I don't know what each day has in store for me - what nasty shocks, bitter disappointments or pleasant surprises (though it's more often the former two) lie in wait for me.
So. Khin dear. This blog entry's dedicated completely to you. You're leaving tomorrow... And I can't see you off. Sucks big time, eh? Oh-well. You take the best care of yourself, all right? I know you'll be fine - after all, going to the US has been your dream for the longest time ever - but still, take care. *hugs-
All righty then. Excuse me while I go do something that I haven't actually indulged in in the longest time ever.
A good long cry. Good-bye, Khin. Smile. :)
heard
those magic reindeer click @
12:13 AM
|
